Sunday, August 3, 2008

Multatuli

POLICE OFFICER. Mr Judge, this is the man who murdered Barbertje.

JUDGE. That man shall be hanged. How did he do it?

POLICE OFFICER. He cut her into small pieces, and he pickled her.

JUDGE. He did a great wrong. He shall hang.

LOTHARIO. Judge, I did not kill Barbertje! I fed her, I clothed her, I cared for her. There are witnesses to testify that I am a good man, not a murderer.

JUDGE. Man, thou shalt hang! Thou makest thy crime worse by self-satisfaction. It isn’t proper for one who stands accused of something, to call himself a good man.

LOTHARIO. But, judge, there are witnesses who will confirm it. And while I am accused of murder ...

JUDGE. Thou shalt hang! Thou hast cut Barbertje into pieces, thou pickled her, and thou art satisfied with thyself … three capital crimes! … Who art thou, lady?

LADY. I am Barbertje.

LOTHARIO. Thank God! Judge, thou seest that I did not kill her!

JUDGE. Hm ... yes ... so! But the pickling?

BARBERTJE. No judge, he did not pickle me. Instead, he hath been very good to me. He is a really righteous man!

LOTHARIO. Thou hearest, judge, she sayth that I am a good man.

JUDGE. Hm ... so the third crime still stands. Police officer, take this man away, he shall hang. He is guilty of self-satisfaction.

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